"stood on the edge, tied to the noose, oh you came along and you cut me loose."

It has occurred to me--not necessarily just now, but strongly just now--that where i and i'd wager you and most everyone else gets it wrong at times is in our pursuit and almost quenchless thirst for feelings that we have defined and expectations our fancies have created. One of the dangers of being emotional beings is that we have a tendency to ascribe to the fulfillment of those emotions a place of ending and closure when emotions are at their foundation caused by people and events and our interactions within and between the two. They are reactions to reality, if you will. And yet we can put so much of ourselves into those reactions that we end up forgetting why we feel them in the first place.

One of the saddest things i see in the world is the falling apart of relationships. Friendships. Brothers and Sisters. Marriages. People--when they see an end game of self-defined emotional well-being--are willing to give up even the people they love if those people are not providing the feelings they desire, or perhaps not providing them fast enough, or maybe too fast, or not often enough. The problem is that when you create this state of feeling in which you want to dwell, and when you place that state above the people you hope help bring you there, your whole plan (and my whole plan) will inevitably fail. And then we blame the failure on the people we love.

For some reason, we have come to view emotions in a very static nature. We tend to automatically assume that because what we feel now is not the same as what we felt yesterday or when we first met, or when we were on our honeymoon, or when we used to go to the pool everyday during the summer, or when we were all younger, that what we feel now is not as good. To put it really, really simply, feelings change. They are kinetic. They don't disappear or evaporate, but they are just edited by life happening, and by people growing up or dying or being born. You and i can feel those emotions and become depressed and despondent because they don't meet our expectations, but here's the thing, our expectations are always, always, always far below what God wants for us. So inferior. Maybe you don't feel like a fuzzy little bear when you're with your girlfriend now. Maybe it's not always fun. But dear God, is that enough reason to throw it away? You see, your feelings have changed, and if infatuation was your end goal, you'll be going through girlfriends and wives for the rest of your life. But infatuation is nothing at all compared to the Love that God designed for you. The Love that knows forgiveness; the Love that is patient and kind; the Love that is selfless and brave.

So what importance will you and i place on feelings and emotions? The foundational issue that decides the answer to that question is how you view what glances back at you in the mirror. For this sin and all other sin starts with you and i placing ourselves first. Before people; before God. If the way you feel is more important than people, then you are in effect saying you are more important than people. That is the reason relationships fail. Magic isn't needed to repair them, only stepping down from that gaudy little throne you made for yourself and remembering that God has been and will continue to be on His majestic throne for all eternity. And by remembering that He said to love others as yourself. If only you and i would decrease so very much so that we could actually see what God wants for us. Sometimes my selfish, emotional obesity clouds my vision, but even if i have blinded myself to the people i love and to Jesus who loved me first, they are still there. Most importantly He is always there, waiting to show me grace. To show us Grace.