Kobe Bryant

if anyone ever compares Kobe Bryant to Michael Jordan ever again, I think I will kick them in the achilles tendon. He does not win championships (his three rings are due to the presence of Shaq). He scores points when it doesn't matter. He plays defense only when he feels like it. He licks his lips in a disturbing fashion wayyyy too often and I wonder how much chapstick he must use. Must i go on? I'm sorry, but i had to write that. Go Celtics.